Who’s Fault Is My Divorce?

In many divorce cases emotions often run high, and the blame game is something most
clients insist on discussing. Many clients arrive at our office with stories about the
cheating spouse, drugs, gambling, pornography, or other poor choices made by their
spouse, which they feel resulted in divorce. Most of these people are angry, and they
want blood. What follows is a somewhat difficult conversation where we must explain
that in Oklahoma where no-fault divorce is the law, the question of “Whose fault is my
divorce?” that fault may not matter at all.

Many people starting the journey of divorce find themselves entangled in the notion of
fault. Was it the result of a specific action, a particular event, or a breakdown in
communication? Oklahoma operates under a no-fault divorce system, meaning the
courts do not require spouses to assign blame for the dissolution of their marriage. In
other words, the fact someone is a dirty rotten human being does not get you a better
result. As in most cases, there are certain circumstances where poor decisions might be
relevant to your case. However, most cases are granted on the grounds of
incompatibility.

Here is my thought on why the system might be set up this way.

1. Saves Time and Resources:

o Without the need to prove fault, divorce proceedings in
Oklahoma tend to be more streamlined, saving both time and
financial resources. Remember, rather than looking for a fight
over fault, resolution has value.

2. Reduces Emotional Stress:

o No-fault divorces often lead to a less emotional legal battle,
helping couples navigate the process with reduced stress.
Remember you were trying to get rid of this person, what plan
do you have in place to make that happen quickly?

3. Focuses on Resolution:
o In a no-fault system, the legal process shifts from assigning
blame to finding equitable solutions for both parties, fostering
a more cooperative approach. At the end of the day, the court
is basically going to make a 50-50 split of your things and look
to do what is in your children’s best interest. Understanding
those two basic concepts will help your case move along
much more quickly than proving someone is a terrible human
being.

In the end, “Whose fault is my divorce?” becomes a question that really does not matter
in Oklahoma. No-fault divorce helps foster an environment where the focus shifts
towards resolution, and a positive post-divorce future. By understanding the principles
of a no-fault system, people can approach divorce with a clearer perspective, and the
opportunity for a new chapter in their lives.